Phil Druker/Department of English/ University of Idaho

NAME____________________________

Style Check and Revision Exercise II
 for the Section of the Final Report (2 points)

***Turn this  (hardcopy, please) in on  Nov 17, in class    ***

To complete this assignment:

A. Copy  and paste this page into Word.

B. Select a paragraph from the "section of the final report" assignment (not paragraph 1); then cut and paste it onto your new page in Word.

C. Then:

1.Count the number of words in each sentence:

S1

S2

S3

S4

S5

S6

S7

S8

S9

S10_______________

Total words:                             Average Length= total words/# of sentences =  _________  (a good average sentence length is 18-24 words)

2.Circle the BE verbs in the paragraph. BE verbs = am, is, are, was, were, been, being, be

3.Count the number of BE verbs.  Number of BE Verbs/# of sentences x100% = %age of BE verbs per sentence.
(This percentage should be less that 33% and certainly less than 50%.)  Show the calculation here:

4. Put a square around the passive verbs. Passive = BE verb + verb+ past form (see p 66).

     examples: was broken, is seen, was asked, will be delivered, has been dropped

5. Count the number of passive sentences. # of passive sentences/# of sentences X 100% =  percentage of PASSIVE verbs per sentence. 
(This percentage should be less that 33% and certainly less than 50%) Show the calculation here:

6.  Put a star above transition words (see  Course Pamphlet page 60, top--subordinators):  This indicates you have a complex sentence.  Number of complex sentences/number of sentences X 100%= % complex sentences.

(If all your sentences are "complex," that's difficult for the reader. If all your sentences are "simple sentences," that's not good either.  Go for a mix: make sure the long sentences are complex)

8. Revise two sentences with BE verbs in them to avoid the Be verb.

9. Revise two sentences with passive sentences to make them active or revise two sentences to reduce wordiness. 

 10. Try to revise two sentences by combining them. Use transition words.  Don't make the sentences too long and strive for clarity!!